6 ways the internet has changed dating

It used to be simple: You meet a guy, you date, and see you whether you want to keep him around. But online dating, Facebook, and even Google have totally changed all that.

We asked Dan Slater, author of the new book Love in the Time of Algorithms: What Technology Does to Meeting and Mating, to share just how tech has changed our dating habits—and it’s not all bad.

We’re More Likely To Trade Up: Because Facebook makes it easier to find new people, both men and women are less likely to remain in crappy relationships. Knowing that a new, better boyfriend is just a few clicks away is a pretty good incentive for ditching a dude who’s just not doing it for you.

We’re Not As Invested In Relationships: But, on the other hand, because it’s so easy to find new people through technology, everyone, for better and worse, is more disposable than they used to be. So, in some ways, we’re not as committed to being committed—and we may tend to focus on what could be.

Read also: 5 ways to get your child to listen to you

We’re Kinkier: There’s a site for every taste and fantasy now, so people are more likely to explore fetishes. At the very least, we have access to learning about how to give a stellar blow job or the best way try new s*x positions —a big win for our s*x lives.

We Play The Field More: If a guy doesn’t call you back, that hurts. If he doesn’t tweet you back, well, who cares, right? With texting, email, and smartphones, chatting and relationship-initiation require less effort, which means the stakes—and the risk of rejection—are also lower.

We Date Outside The Box: Contrary to popular opinion, tech actually makes it more likely, not less, that you’ll date people who are outside your “type.” In fact, dating sites expose us to far more eligible dudes then we’d find in our areas, giving us more options.

We’re More Likely To Snoop: Okay, we know we shouldn’t monitor our crush’s online activity (or, for that matter, Google search him before our first date) but, thanks to social media—and our BFF Google—we can. And, we’re more likely to become paranoid in relationships because we’re able to keep tabs on our guy online.

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