How to make long distance relationships work

No one’s ever said that long distance relationships are easy, but they don’t have to ruin your relationship either. With the right commitment and communication, long distance relationships can actually be more stable than geographically close relationships. Simple adjustments to your attitude and lifestyle can help you keep your loved one in your life.

Here are some tips to help out:

Stay in contact. Since you won’t be seeing each other in person, it’s important to establish and maintain an emotional connection as often as you can. These don’t always have to be long, in-depth conversations. Frequent communication, no matter how minor, will show that you care enough to put in the time and effort into the relationship and it’s easier to keep up to date with each other’s lives. If you allow large (days at a time) gaps to pass by, your everyday experiences fade into the background, and you will have to start from scratch every time you speak.

Talk about the mundane, little things. Don’t feel as though every conversation needs to be a thoughtful discussion about your relationship, hopes, or dreams. Instead, focus on the little things that couples who live together would, such as grocery shopping, doing chores around the house, or redecorating. This gives the feeling of creating a home together, something you both can look forward to.

Visit often. Try to make the time to visit each other as often as possible or as often as your budget permits. You need to see each other in person at every opportunity. Make a regular visiting schedule or at least make plans for the next visit as soon as each one ends. Face-to-face communication is just as important as having relationship satisfaction, commitment, and trust.

 

Get to know each other. Just like any relationship, you should spend some time really get to know and understand your partner. When talking, take note of things your partner enjoys the most (like hobbies or day-to-day activities) and do a little research on it so you have something more to discuss.

Read also: 7 reasons you should try online dating

Remember that your partner is human. Distance makes the heart grow fonder, but can also make you idealize your partner. While this can make your relationship stable, extreme idealization (thinking your partner is perfect) will make it more difficult to reunite with the actual person.

Support each other, even over the distance. Be there for your partner if your partner is ever in trouble, hurt, or for whatever reason. You need to make yourself available to help so your partner knows you care. If your partner ends up dealing with important issues alone, your partner will eventually not need you. Interdependence refers to the willingness to act against your own self-interest for the benefit of you partner, or for your relationship. Instead, supporting each other creates an interdependence that is crucial for a long distance relationship.

Create trust. Trust in a relationship is vital, regardless of distance. Try your best to be faithful and avoid temptation. If you do make a mistake, it’s especially important to be honest and tell your partner the truth in cases where lying would benefit you. For example, if you put yourself in a position of temptation (like going to a bar), lying about your whereabouts would benefit you personally, but would benefit your relationship if you were honest.

Be committed to each other. Be open and honest by volunteering private information. You should both be morally committed to each other, continuing the relationship because of personal values, not because of social pressures.

Credit: wikihow.com

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