Naughty wife’s diary: The Explosive Valentine

Making an explosive Valentine plan was not as easy as I had envisaged. I thought about buying a new s*x toy, but there was nothing new about it. I wanted something out of the blues that could blow Jimmy’s mind to smithereens. The bathroom was out of the question, we have overused it. Even the kitchen had seen something in our hands. Don’t even suggest the couches, they are worn bare by now.

I thought about his office, but I had stampeded him there before. And we had also done it in his village. The only place we had not tried anything was on top of a mountain, in a bush, in a swimming pool, or the beach. The beach was out of the question for there was none in Abuja, except we decided to take a trip to wherever we could find one.

Valentine was on Sunday, so, Jimmy would be at home throughout thereby denying me the privacy to plan in peace, or in secret. So, I had to device a means of keeping him out of the loop while I got things underway. I needed an accomplice, so I called my usual and dependable partner in crime, Bibian.

On Sunday, the Val day, as is my tradition, I called all my family members, wishing them a Happy Val. I had sent them e-greeting cards the previous day. My nephews and nieces got gifts from me via their parents. All I did was to pay in money into the parents accounts to buy my choice gifts for them. It was way easier.

So, that Sunday, I left the house to church, carrying a hamper. Jimmy was with me too. After service, while he was greeting some friends, I disappeared on him. I slipped away and made my way to a place I had marked out. It was a hill that overlooked our Estate. I found a bald spot, and spread a rug on it. I undressed down to the hottest undies I found in stores; a red lacy number with black trimmings.

So, I opened the hamper and poured myself a glass of wine while I waited for Jimmy to search for me frantically until Bibian would point him towards the hills, telling him I had gone there for a prayer meeting.

Thirty minutes later, I saw him puffing up the mountains, his face dark with rage and I could see his jaws tight and set with anger. I was sure he was coming up here to give me a tongue-lashing.

When he made the hill and saw me, his jaw dropped and his mouth remained opened as I drew him down to sit beside me.

I helped him pull of his jacket while I savoured the surprise I sprang on him. This was epic.

I handed him a glass of wine. ‘I never thought of this,’ he confessed, still dazed.

‘Well, you should know I wasn’t going to let this day pass just like that.’ I kissed him. The taste of the wine on his lips was good to savour alongside my victory. I straddled him, the breeze soft and caressing our skin. I felt light and free and deeply in love. This is the kind of moment you are glad to be alive.

‘What if someone comes up here?’ he asked me nervously, looking down the grass knoll.

‘Only a fool would see a couple screwing and still come up this hill.’

‘Why did you choose here?’ he asked me.

I looked down the hill, to the roads below and the cars crawling along them, the houses and tiny dots of heads. ‘I want to see how it feels, f**king while looking down on Abuja. The seat of power is worth f**king down on.’

Jimmy laughed. He stopped laughing when my bra came off.

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