6 ways to bully-proof your child

Bullying is one of those inevitable facts of life. As much as parents try to eliminate it, schools try to govern it, and politicians try to legislate it, bullying will not ever go away. Why? Because there will always be people in the world who will use cruelty to dominate others. Kids aren’t the only ones who experience bullying. Adults bully too, and often raise kids who emulate that bullying behaviour – and so the cycle continues.

You can help your kids deal with bullying in all its forms by teaching them, first and foremost, how to recognize, prevent and deal with it. Below are some tips to help your kids withstand bullying.

Walk Away: It’s not always easy to walk away when being bullied, but walking away is a life skill that your kids will need to learn for when they are adults, too. Walking away means that even when your instinct is to defend yourself or engage in a verbal exchange, you understand that staying to fight may cause things to get out of control.

Diffuse The Situation: There are often ways to get out of a bullying problem by being a peacemaker. If your child is being taunted about something like his appearance, teach him to deflect tormentors with a joke, rather than a jab. If kids can make bullies laugh, they’ll likely move on. It’ll help later in life when mean adults pull the same nonsense.

Report It: Don’t let your kids feel like they have to deal with bullying by themselves. Kids simply don’t have the skills to back down a bully and may need adult intervention. Many kids are afraid of being further teased for being a “tattle-tale” so they don’t report bullying. However, make it clear to your kids that you are their strongest advocate and that if they report it to you; you will do everything in your power to make it go away.

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Fight Back: There will inevitably be times when walking away just won’t be an option. Some kids are so bullied that they are physically harmed. Despite many contrary opinions, when your kids can’t walk away, it’s okay for them to learn how to physically defend themselves. A martial arts program will not only teach your kids to fight, but will teach them when and how to fight – and when not to.

Stay In Groups: If your child gets singled out, teach her to stay in a group of friends whenever a bully is around. Usually, friends will stick up for each other. If your child needs help, or even witnesses, a group of friends will provide that. Likewise, your child can learn to be a friend and advocate for others who are bullied.

Don’t Ignore It: Bullying can’t be ignored. As much as kids would like to pretend it away or minimize it, they may only internalize it. Later on, bullying can manifest in problems with self-confidence and self-esteem, which can lead to self-medicating behaviours and worse. Teach your kids that it is not okay to bully others or to be bullied. They need to learn to deal with it as a serious issue, right from the start.

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